Oh what a day

First off, I had a request to peak to one of our cruising companions about their wardrobe. It seems that once again the idea of appropriate clothing is trying to pass as "comfort". It seem that this person wants to dress like Paul Bunyan in a luxury ship. Then he will bitch that people look awful and not well put together...HELLO Mr Bunyan the invitation for cocktails said jacket and tie... oh oh.. and then he will say why don't we dance...for fuck sake, look at those shoes and socks... even the Chinese have now decided that white socks and leather shoes are a no go... maybe next thing will be no socks and sandals!

Moving along, worked all week and it was interesting. Some stress lots of moving around and a month end closing. Best part is that I found a new Italian Deli that uses exceptionally good bread in their sandwiches. However, by Wednesday I was tired by days end today I was exhausted. Need to get more energy soon.

Doctor reports... Tuesday I go to see the gastroenterologist, if I was a psychic I would say I have a colonoscpy in my very near future... triple eeekkk. Then I get a 4 week brake before the next CT Scan right after we come back from Alaska. Since my arm movements are progressing I hope that I can get into the tunnel with both arms raised over my head... we shall see what happens.

One last thing... 22 days to Alaska and I can't wait...I have this friend Luis.. we have been friends since first grade and were always together. Later in life we always kept in touch and he has been my only real connection back to Puerto Rico. Today, by coincidence he calls from Anchorage to say hi... love weird coincidences... and now I have a recommendation for a good place for lunch... The Glacier Brew House.

it's over

As of Monday, my disability is over and I am back full time at work. I can't wait to a) have the distraction of leaving the apartment and b) the interaction with my people. Even though I visited all week last week, that was just re-entry. Next week I have every intention in shaking things up and surprising a few people. Some will be happy, some might not be.

I am a firm believer in stirring the pot... and the pot will be stirred... it seem that some people need the ladle ... never mind...

Alaska or bust

First of all, 29 days to go to Alaska… can’t wait! Things I am looking forward to, a big change of scene, mushing on the glacier, bicycling down the mountain and of course… eating like a pig. Only thing I am not looking forward to…The red-eye flight back from Seattle..YUKE Secondly, 531 days to the world cruise. Still have that in my head, let’s see if we can make it work.

Besides some daydreaming, I am sitting at work after having navigated through the streets of Boston. We have been inundated the last couple of days with torrential rains and the water decided to stay on all the main roads and wait for my car to part the seas. It has been very interesting that the normal never ending New England drizzle has been changed to tropical monsoons. The commute has absolutely sucked!

No shower for me

Today I woke up to no shower. As I turned the knob to start the water I clearly noticed that NOTHING was coming out of the shower head. Not a good start to the day. I called downstairs to see if it was our apartment, the building, the town or the universe, maybe we had an alien attack and there is no more water. A water main broke down the street… great no shower this morning… super suck… I did a decent job in the grooming and cleaning with the available resources and a little cologne to mask any odors and of we go. Meanwhile not even 10 minutes later, Paul calls and announces that the water has been turned on again. Crappy timing !

Sleeping and other things

The past few days have been very uneventful. I have been going to work every day for about 4-6 hours and getting the arm use to the long ride up to New Hampshire. Overall, not bad. The only problem that we are encountering right now is that the fluid that used to drain out of the body and into the bottle has nowhere to go. Until different areas of the body get use to reabsorbing it, I have small bumps of fluid. They seem to be mostly under and around the armpit and I seem to notice them most when I go to sleep… try to sleep that is. I’ve yet to find a comfortable position since I prefer to sleep face down and the arm does not like to extend that much to accommodate that position. That means that I end up trying to sleep on my side with a pillow under my arm or sleeping on my back which I absolutely hate. Not even my trusted Tylenol PM helps on this one.

The little things that pop up

Interestingly, this time around I asked both surgeons what other body parts of functions were going to be affected by the surgery. One of them has been that under the upper part of my arm and a little of the forearm, it has gone numb. Numb is not right, it is more like hypersensitive with a side of numbness. This in turn has made going through the drive-thru at Dunkin Donuts interesting. I end up giving the money and retrieving my coffee with the right hand while holding the steering wheel with the left hand or the leg. This is such fun!

That was where???

Yesterday at the doctors I was dreading the pain of the tube coming out. Best case scenario, it would just feel weird, so to ameliorate any possibility of pain, a double dose of Vicodan was in order. Once the doctor arrived at the examining room, he had an outloud debate with himself about the merits of taking the tube out or leaving it in. He finally agreed with himself that the best course of action would be to take the fucking tube out.

I braced for the worst...see during the last surgery, they yanked 3 tubes out of my belly and those hurt like a MOFO...so nurse Paul positions himself with grand stand viewing of my face and the tube....the doctor says are you ready...and he pulls...i feel absolutely nothing, HOWEVER he shows me this 12 inch section of tubing and says, not bad, all that was in your shoulder... NO WONDER IS WAS SO FUCKING PAINFUL!

Once again...

Tomorrow we go to doctor to see if the bastard is going to finally take the tube out of my armpit. I realize that this is way too much information, BUT I have not worn any deodorant for at least 4 months on the left armpit and I don't smell... So according to doctor last time, they would like the flow out of the armpit to be less than 40cc per day.. however I am still about twice that much... If they tell me to keep the tube in longer I will either punch the doctor or pull my arm out... I AM DESPERATE

what is in my head today???

Let's see consider today's blog a bunch of unrelated thoughts.

The "company" or the assisted visiting service has been put on an on-call basis. They do not need to come over every day, unless they need to do laundry.

I can't wait for Tuesday, I am about to rip that damn drainage tube out. It is driving me crazy and completely hindering movement. Last night Paul patiently (and me with a vicodan) pushed a blob that was clogging the tube down to the drainage bulb. Mother fucker hurt! but the tube fluid is clear now. Thanks nurse Paulsito.

We have decided to fit one way or the other a trip to Alaska before my next set of scans and doctor appointments. Think of it as a vacation from the recuperation. There are 2 excursions I want to do mushing on the glacier and perhaps cycling down a mountain.

The builder in New Hampshire is driving me nutty... they claim they will be done by July 31st but all the lamps, bathroom stuff, knobs fans and accessories are still in Quincy.. mmmm

I started knitting another sweater, burn orange/red for me. If you go back in the blog, I gave my green cable sweater to my brother in law.

World Cruise 114 days L.A. to Ft Lauderdale

I realize I might be just dreaming with pregnant birds, but I really am going to try to pull this one off. I received the 2010 from Holland America (it is not published yet, but if you request it they send it to you) A couple of highligts, one of them being Antartica cruising, possibly Macchu Pichu, 3 ports in South Africa, The Seychelles, and lots of Vietnam/China/Japan.

Regrettably, no Australia or New Zeland. I day dream about this trip constantly, so stay tuned for 2010 to see if I'm on the ship.!

The Flu

What can I say...nothing simple for this boy. On Saturday we were supposed to go up to Waterville to see if there had been progress in the house, but Paul had developed a cold. Needless to say if the main nurse is sick, eventually the patient will be too. By Sunday, I was starting the sniffles and the aches. Monday, it was sniffles aches and upset stomach. By today, all I do is fall asleep everywhere, hopefully by tomorrow, I can start taking ailments off the list. One way or the other, I am going to work next week.

New fun blogs

These two blogs are my latest guilty pleasures... They are also very interesting since it is clearly a different point of view.

Galley Gossip and the cockpit chronicles.

Holland America Vs Cunard

For whatever reason, since cancer 1.0 I've had this thing about finally doing a world cruise. After much research, we have decided that the two cruise lines in contention are Holland America and Cunard (Queen Victoria). Needless to say, it is not an inexpensive trip because of the lenght of the trip (between 90-100 days).

It would be ultra cool if we pick the Queen Victoria for he world cruise and my readers would join us for the last leg of the trip, the 6 day crossing from Southampton England to New York City.

the good doctor speaks

On Wednesday, I had to visit my main surgeon doctor. Needless to say, I adore this man, not only for having incredible hands, but his demeanor is always just wonderful. After going through the official chatter, we got down to business. He showed us in close up the latest X-ray they had taken that morning. I have at least 40 staples all over the place plus about 9 cable ties holding my sternum together. Not bad for 2 big surgeries, it looks like Home Depot.

Then his tone turned (at least that was my perception) and basically said that the cancer had most likely spread through the blood stream and that we needed to be aware it could happen again. They did leave a tiny bit behind attached to the axillary artery and that would be treated with either chemo or radiation. Needless to say, tiny bit behind is not what I wanted to hear, take the whole fucking thing and call it a day. I have asked Eileen to make a blog entry to see what her perception was since I think we were both a little shocked.

As I mentioned to the doctor that January 2010 I had a 4 month vacation planned (the world cruise! more on that next entry) and to make sure I was alive and well. His answer.. "let's take one season at a time" yikes it sounded ominous... either way, I got home and started planning all the cruises from now till the world cruise. I need practice and stamina!

Meltdowns are not just for Ice Cream

Yesterday, I had a full nuclear meltdown... It was hot, it was humid and the doctor said that the drain had to remain in place for 1 to 2 more weeks. He wanted me to be moving my arm clear above my head and to walking around. All this was said with a lovely "I understand it hurts but you will have to deal with it" face. After that he proceeded to "milk" the drain tube (OUCH OUCH OUCH)and send me on my merry way.

Contrary to cancer 1.0 in which my mind was in a haze all the time and breathing was more important that any other problem, this time, I am perfectly lucid but unable to do things because the arm just doesn't do what my brain tells it to. This is a royal pain in the cojones and the arm. Two more weeks of this will be an endurance test, as is my mind is turning on me and what usually does not bother me, becomes a gigantic issue. When is this crap going to be done? according to the most recent estimates end of July or so, but I won't have any illusion that it will be that way.

At this point everyone expects me to pull through in my usual stoic manner, but for 24 hours, I will bitch and moan and simply say... this is a fucking pain in the ass and it would be nice if it was over and resolved... since it is not going to happen that quickly, my answer to everything from now on is... fine, I am doing just fine... I will be concentrating very hard to make it sound like I mean it.